随便写点

by 小葵 on 2012/08/8

 

2008年8月8号。某人21岁生日。北京奥运会。四年就这么过去了,无法置信。

那一天的A城市,是个晴朗天。而今天的杭州,下起台风雨。

年少的时光,完全释然,也无遗憾,甚至后知后觉,还有收获。

 

很多记忆还是被时间吞掉了,越想去记得点什么,其实所剩无几。

 

甚至更觉得几年前的自己更活力一点,有很多很多期冀,靠着这些期冀一直努力的向上生长,阳光充足。

而现在的我,更多的是一直在调整自己,去适应,妥协,甚至怀疑自己,并且一直伴随着拖延症,缺少阳光。

 

本来下午思绪满满,说写篇励志点儿的博文,一定拒绝感伤。一下午听歌,喝茶,聊天就这么厮混过去。

现在才来续写,却无字可码。

 

前段时间阳光过剩,蓝天白云。我想要雨,结果雨就来了,海葵带来的。

今天尝试了下听古典音乐,时而静谧,时而振奋。推荐卡农。

 

接到一个电话,能感觉到那种真实的傻,但是从我的价值观就开始抗拒了。

某人说我对自己太苛刻了,是吗。我怎么觉得我对自己太好了,停在舒适区不离开。

 

开始正视自己已不是小女生这个事,思考的东西和所谓的压力多了。家人工作生活梦想。

看到同龄女生都进入婚姻,生小娃。我为自己的幼稚感到小小的畏惧。

给自己设置了个25岁倒计时,每天看着时间一天天溜走,自己还没有进步,就觉得不安宁。

 

开始关心自己的体重,不是再吃不胖的女生。提醒自己早睡,身体吃不消。

越来越没毅力,越来越依赖电脑手机。

那天暴练了下瑜伽,坚持下去真的很难,身体有种要废了的感觉。无法找回从前的坚韧和和谐。

 

我阳台上这批植物又快死掉了。

收到colin的礼物了,没想象中那么开心。

 

 

开始习惯用evernote代替黑莓的记事薄记录灵感和碎片。

也学着GTD,列很多大的小的事项清单,一件件完成了,我的心才会安。

检讨自己迷信MBTI,用以指导和异性适合与否。后来觉得我这种行为和相信星座没有差别。

因为心理学测试的量度很严格,并非一些题目就能以偏概全,信度偏低。

 

唉,不想写了。

回忆过去毫无意义,畏惧未来毫无意义。

 

活在当下,做好当下。

言多必失,言多必败。

 

 

 

..

 

.

 

 

 

 

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